Saturday, December 29, 2007

How to Reach 50 Years Together

I was talking to my patient and his wife today, a couple that are still so sweet and loving even after 48 years of marriage. "So what's the magic formula to keep things strong?" I asked. Yes, it might seem a redundant question but her response was one that really tugged chords with me.

"Commitment. There is no out clause for us. We vowed forever and we will do everything in our power to keep that vow." She told me that they had been through some rough times, and there are moments that even she would want to pull his hair out. But she always reminded herself that she "went into this with my eyes wide open and will stay in it with my eyes wide open."

It just got me reflecting on how our generation is so ready to call it quits as soon as the relationship hits the skids or calamity strikes. We have become a generation of fast food relationships, where friends, family and loves are casually tossed aside when they no longer fulfill our needs or something better comes along.

Alot of my patients went through the depression, and they hold on to everything from a shoe string to a piece of tissue paper. What we view as waste, they store and keep for when it will be needed. But I'm getting off topic here...

Oh yeah, so the formula to a long lasting relationship by my lady in room 17;
  • Commitment
  • Good Communication--talk about everything, your thoughts, your actions, your motives etc. This will help you see where the other person is coming from.
  • Never going to bed mad--and always have sex even if you are fighting. This shifts the energy of the argument and reconnects you.
  • Don't be afraid to seek counseling or professional help
Oh, and if your guy is sick in the hospital, come with a cheery attitude, some good food and a smile. It will do wonders for his health.


T Nurse News said...

Very interesting! You've got a great nursing blog here. We've just started a nursing news blog, and we'd love to get your comments on there. Thanks!

raecatherine said...

isn't it great to meet such strong couples? it's nice to see live examples of strong, long-lasting marriages. there are far too few!